Card Name:
Cost: 1U
Type: Creature — Shapeshifter
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: 1: This card's name becomes the name of your choice.
Play this ability anywhere, anytime.
Flavor Text: 1: This card’s flavor text becomes the flavor text of
your choice. (This ability doesn’t work because it’s
flavor text, not rules text (but neither does this
reminder text, so you figure it out).)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Aesthetic Consultation
Cost: B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Name an artist. Remove the top six cards of your library
from the game, then reveal cards from the top of your
library until you reveal a card by the named artist.
Put that card in your hand, then remove all the other
cards revealed this way from the game.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Ambiguity
Cost: 2UU
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Whenever a player plays a spell that counters a spell
that has been played or a player plays a spell that
comes into play with counters, that player may counter
the next spell played or put an additional counter
on a permanent that has already been played, but not
countered.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Artful Looter
Cost: 2U
Type: Creature — Human Wizard
Pow/Tgh: 1/2
Rules Text: T: Draw a card, then discard a card.
Whenever a permanent comes into play that shares an
artist with another permanent you control, untap Artful
Looter.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Ass Whuppin'
Cost: 1WB
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Destroy target silver-bordered permanent in any game
you can see from your seat.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Assquatch
Cost: 4R
Type: Creature — Donkey Lord
Pow/Tgh: 3{1/2}/3{1/2}
Rules Text: Each other Donkey gets +11/2/+11/2.
Whenever another Donkey comes into play, untap target
creature and gain control of it until end of turn.
That creature gains haste until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Atinlay Igpay
Cost: 5W
Type: Eaturecray — Igpay
Pow/Tgh: 3/3
Rules Text: Oubleday ikestray
Eneverwhay Atinlay Igpay's ontrollercay eaksspay ay
onnay-Igpay-Atinlay ordway, acrificesay Atinlay Igpay.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Avatar of Me
Cost: 2UU
Type: Creature — Avatar
Pow/Tgh: */*
Rules Text: Avatar of Me costs 1 more to play for each ten years
you've been alive.
Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height in feet
and its toughness is equal to your American shoe size.
Round to the nearest 1/2.

Avatar of Me's color is the color of your eyes.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: AWOL
Cost: 2W
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Remove target attacking creature from the game. Then
remove it from the removed-from-game zone and put it
into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever
zone.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Bad Ass
Cost: 2BB
Type: Creature — Donkey Zombie
Pow/Tgh: 3{1/2}/1
Rules Text: 1B, Growl: Regenerate Bad Ass.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: B-I-N-G-O
Cost: 1G
Type: Creature — Hound
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: Trample
Whenever a player plays a spell, put a chip counter
on its converted mana cost.
B-I-N-G-O gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers
in a row with chip counters on them.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Blast from the Past
Cost: 2R
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Madness R, cycling 1R, kicker 2R, flashback 3R, buyback
4R
Blast from the Past deals 2 damage to target creature
or player.
If the kicker cost was paid, put a 1/1 red Goblin creature
token into play.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Bloodletter
Cost: 2B
Type: Creature — Zombie
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: When the names of three or more nonland permanents
begin with the same letter, sacrifice Bloodletter.
If you do, it deals 2 damage to each creature and each
player.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Booster Tutor
Cost: B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Open a sealed Magic booster pack, reveal the
cards, and put one of those cards into your hand. (Remove
that card from your deck before beginning a new game.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Bosom Buddy
Cost: 3W
Type: Creature — Elephant Townsfolk
Pow/Tgh: 1/4
Rules Text: Whenever you play a spell, you may gain 1/2 life for
each word in that spell's name.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Brushstroke Paintermage
Cost: 3U
Type: Creature — Human Wizard
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: T: Target permanent's artist becomes the artist of
your choice until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Bursting Beebles
Cost: 2U
Type: Creature — Beeble
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Bursting Beebles is unblockable as long as defending
player controls two or more nonland permanents that
share an artist.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Cardpecker
Cost: 1W
Type: Creature — Bird
Pow/Tgh: 1{1/2}/1
Rules Text: Flying
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent touches the table with
his or her hand, you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return
Cardpecker from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Carnivorous Death-Parrot
Cost: 1U
Type: Creature — Bird
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Flying
At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Carnivorous
Death-Parrot unless you say its flavor text.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Cheap Ass
Cost: 1W
Type: Creature — Donkey Townsfolk
Pow/Tgh: 1/3{1/2}
Rules Text: Spells you play cost 1/2 less to play.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Cheatyface
Cost: UUU
Type: Creature — Efreet
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: You may sneak Cheatyface into play at any time without
paying for it, but if an opponent catches you right
away, that player may remove Cheatyface from the game.
Flying
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Circle of Protection: Art
Cost: 1W
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Circle of Protection: Art comes into play, choose
an artist.
1W: The next time a source of your choice by the chosen
artist would deal damage to you this turn, prevent
that damage.
1W: Return Circle of Protection: Art to its owner's
hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: City of Ass
Cost:
Type: Land
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: City of Ass comes into play tapped.
T: Add one and one-half mana of any one color to your
mana pool.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Collector Protector
Cost: 3WW
Type: Creature — Human Gamer
Pow/Tgh: 2/5
Rules Text: W, Give an opponent a nonland card you own from outside
the game: Prevent the next 1 damage that would be dealt
to you or Collector Protector this turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Creature Guy
Cost: 3G
Type: Creature — Beast
Pow/Tgh: 3/3
Rules Text: Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says "Creature" or "Guy,"
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Creature Guy
from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Curse of the Fire Penguin
Cost: 4RR
Type: Enchant Creature
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Curse of the Fire Penquin consumes and confuses enchanted
creature.
-----
Creature — Penguin
Trample
When this creature is put into a graveyard from play,
return Curse of the Fire Penguin from your graveyard
to play.

6/5
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Deal Damage
Cost: 2RR
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Deal Damage deals 4 damage to target creature or player.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says "Deal" or "Damage,"
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Deal Damage
from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Double Header
Cost: 3UU
Type: Creature — Drake
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: Flying
When Double Header comes into play, you may return
target permanent with a two-word name to its owner's
hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Drawn Together
Cost: 2WW
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Drawn Together comes into play, choose an artist.
Creatures by the chosen artist get +2/+2.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Duh
Cost: B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Destroy target creature with reminder text. (Reminder
text is any italicized text in parentheses that explains
rules you already know.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Dumb Ass
Cost: 2R
Type: Creature — Donkey Barbarian
Pow/Tgh: 3{1/2}/2
Rules Text: At the beginning of your upkeep, flip a coin. If you
lose the flip, target opponent chooses whether Dumb
Ass attacks this turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Elvish House Party
Cost: 4GG
Type: Creature — Elf Rogue
Pow/Tgh: */*
Rules Text: Elvish House Party's power and toughness are each equal
to the current hour, using the twelve-hour system.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Emcee
Cost: 2W
Type: Creature — Human Rogue
Pow/Tgh: 0/1
Rules Text: Whenever another creature comes into play, you may
stand up and say in a deep, booming voice "Presenting
. . . " and that creature's name. If you do, put a
+1/+1 counter on that creature.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Enter the Dungeon
Cost: BB
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Players play a Magic subgame under the table
starting at 5 life, using their libraries as their
decks. After the subgame ends, the winner searches
his or her library for two cards, puts those cards
into his or her hand, then shuffles his or her library.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Erase (Not the <i>Urza's Legacy</i> One)
Cost: 2W
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: If you control two or more white permanents that share
an artist, you may play Erase (Not the Urza's Legacy
One) without paying its mana cost.
Remove target enchantment from the game.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Eye to Eye
Cost: 2B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You and target creature's controller have a staring
contest. If you win, destroy that creature.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Face to Face
Cost: 1R
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You and target opponent play a best two-out-of-three
Rock, Paper, Scissors match. If you win, Face to Face
deals 5 damage to that opponent.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Farewell to Arms
Cost: 1BB
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Farewell to Arms comes into play, choose a hand
attached to an opponent's arm.
When the chosen hand isn't behind its owner's back,
sacrifice Farewell to Arms. If you do, that player
discards his or her hand . . . of cards. (The lawyers
wouldn't let us do it the other way.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Fascist Art Director
Cost: 1WW
Type: Creature — Human Horror
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: WW: Fascist Art Director gains protection from the
artist of your choice until end of turn..
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Fat Ass
Cost: 4G
Type: Creature — Donkey Shaman
Pow/Tgh: 2/3{1/2}
Rules Text: Fat Ass gets +2/+2 and has trample as long as you're
eating. (Food is in your mouth and you're chewing,
licking, sucking, or swallowing it.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: First Come, First Served
Cost: 1W
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: The attacking or blocking creature with the lowest
collector number has first strike. If two or more creatures
are tied, they all have first strike.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Flaccify
Cost: 2U
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Counter target spell unless its controller pays 31/2.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Forest
Cost:
Type: Basic Land — Forest
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: [G]
Set/Rarity: Basic land


Card Name: Form of the Squirrel
Cost: G
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Form of the Squirrel comes into play, put a 1/1
green Squirrel creature token into play. You lose the
game when it leaves play.
Creatures can't attack you.
You can't be the target of spells or abilities.

You can't play spells.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Fraction Jackson
Cost: 2G
Type: Creature — Human Hero
Pow/Tgh: 1/1{1/2}
Rules Text: G, T: Return target card with a 1/2 on it from your
graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Framed!
Cost: 1U
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Tap or untap all permanents by the artist of your choice.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Frankie Peanuts
Cost: 2WW
Type: Legendary Creature — Elephant Rogue
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target
player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player
answers the question truthfully and abides by that
answer if able until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Frazzled Editor
Cost: 1R
Type: Creature — Human Bureaucrat
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Protection from wordy (Something is wordy if it has
four or more lines of text in its text box.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Gleemax
Cost: 1,000,000
Type: Legendary Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You choose all targets for all spells and abilities.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Gluetius Maximus
Cost: 3GG
Type: Creature — Beast
Pow/Tgh: 5/5
Rules Text: As Gluetius Maximus comes into play, an opponent chooses
one of your fingers. (Thumbs are fingers, too.)
When the chosen finger isn't touching Gluetius Maximus,
sacrifice Gluetius Maximus.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Goblin Mime
Cost: 1R
Type: Creature — Goblin Mime
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: When you speak, sacrifice Goblin Mime.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Goblin S.W.A.T. Team
Cost: 3R
Type: Creature — Goblin Warrior
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Say "Goblin S.W.A.T. Team": Put a +1/+1 counter on
Goblin S.W.A.T. Team unless an opponent swats the table
within five seconds. Play this ability only once each
turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Goblin Secret Agent
Cost: 2R
Type: Creature — Goblin Rogue
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: First strike
At the beginning of your upkeep, reveal a card from
your hand at random.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Granny's Payback
Cost: 7G
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You gain life equal to your age.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Graphic Violence
Cost: 2G
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: All creatures by the artist of your choice get +2/+2
and gain trample until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Greater Morphling
Cost: 6UU
Type: Creature — Shapeshifter
Pow/Tgh: 5/5
Rules Text: 2: Greater Morphling gains your choice of banding,
bushido 1, double strike, fear, flying, first strike,
haste, landwalk of your choice, protection from a color
of your choice, provoke, rampage 1, shadow, or trample
until end of turn.
2: Greater Morphling becomes the colors of your choice
until end of turn.
2: Greater Morphling's type becomes the creature type
of your choice until end of turn.
2: Greater Morphling's expansion symbol becomes the
symbol of your choice until end of turn.
2: Greater Morphling's artist becomes the artist of
your choice until end of turn.
2: Greater Morphling gets +2/-2 or -2/+2 until end
of turn.
2: Untap Greater Morphling.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Head to Head
Cost: W
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You and target opponent play Seven Questions about
the top card of that player's library. (That player
looks at the card, then you ask up to six yes-or-no
questions about the card that he or she answers truthfully.
You guess the card's name—that's question seven—and
the player reveals the card.) If you win, prevent all
damage that would be dealt this turn by a source of
your choice.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Infernal Spawn of Infernal Spawn of Evil
Cost: 8BB
Type: Creature — Demon Child
Pow/Tgh: 8/8
Rules Text: Flying, first strike, trample
If you say "I'm coming, too!" as you search your library,
you may pay 1B and reveal Infernal Spawn of Infernal
Spawn of Evil from your library to have it deal 2 damage
to a player of your choice. Do this no more than once
each turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Island
Cost:
Type: Basic Land — Island
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: [U]
Set/Rarity: Basic land


Card Name: Johnny, Combo Player
Cost: 2UU
Type: Legendary Creature — Human Gamer
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: 4: Search your library for a card and put that card
into your hand. Then shuffle your library.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Keeper of the Sacred Word
Cost: 2G
Type: Creature — Human Druid
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: As Keeper of the Sacred Word comes into play, choose
a word.
Whenever an opponent says the chosen word, Keeper of
the Sacred Word gets +3/+3 until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Kill! Destroy!
Cost: 1BB
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Destroy target nonblack creature.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says "Kill" or "Destroy,"
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Kill! Destroy!
from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Ladies' Knight
Cost: 3W
Type: Creature — Human Knight
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Flying
Spells that players wearing at least one item of women's
clothing play cost 1 less to play. (Women's clothing
is designed to be worn exclusively by women.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Land Aid '04
Cost: GG
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Search your library for a basic land card, put that
card into play tapped, then shuffle your library. If
you sang a song the whole time you were searching and
shuffling, you may untap that land.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Laughing Hyena
Cost: 1G
Type: Creature — Hyena
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Gotcha — Whenever an opponent laughs, you may say "Gotcha!"
If you do, return Laughing Hyena from your graveyard
to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Letter Bomb
Cost: 6
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: When Letter Bomb comes into play, sign it and shuffle
it into target player's library. That player reveals
each card he or she draws until Letter Bomb is drawn.
When that player draws Letter Bomb, it deals 191/2
damage to him or her.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Little Girl
Cost: W (half)
Type: Creature — Human Child
Pow/Tgh: {1/2}/{1/2}
Rules Text:
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Look at Me, I'm R&D
Cost: 2W
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Look at Me, I'm R&D comes into play, choose a number
and a second number one higher or one lower than that
number.
All instances of the first chosen number on permanents,
spells, and cards in any zone are the second chosen
number.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Loose Lips
Cost: U
Type: Enchant Creature
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Loose Lips comes into play, choose a sentence with
eight or fewer words.
Enchanted creature has flying.
Whenever enchanted creature deals damage to an opponent,
you draw two cards unless that player says the chosen
sentence.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Magical Hacker
Cost: 1U
Type: Creature — Human Gamer
Pow/Tgh: 1/2
Rules Text: U: Change the text of target spell or permanent by
replacing all instances of + with -, and vice versa,
until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Man of Measure
Cost: 1WW
Type: Creature — Human Knight
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: As long as you're shorter than an opponent, Man of
Measure has first strike and gets +0/+1.
As long as you're taller than an opponent, Man of Measure
gets +1/+0.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Mana Flair
Cost: 1R
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Add R to your mana pool for each nonland permanent
by the artist of your choice.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Mana Screw
Cost: 1
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 1: Flip a coin. If you win the flip, add 2 to your
mana pool. Play this ability only any time you could
play an instant.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Meddling Kids
Cost: 2WU
Type: Creature — Human Child
Pow/Tgh: 2/3
Rules Text: As Meddling Kids comes into play, choose a word with
four or more letters.
Nonland cards with the chosen word in their text box
can't be played.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Mise
Cost: U
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Name a nonland card, then reveal the top card of your
library. If that card is the named card, draw three
cards.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Moniker Mage
Cost: 2U
Type: Creature — Human Wizard
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: U, Say your middle name: Moniker Mage can't be the
target of spells or abilities this turn.
U, Say an opponent's middle name: Moniker Mage gains
flying until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Monkey Monkey Monkey
Cost: 3G
Type: Creature — Ape
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: As Monkey Monkey Monkey comes into play, choose a letter.
Monkey Monkey Monkey gets +1/+1 for each nonland permanent
whose name begins with the chosen letter.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Mons's Goblin Waiters
Cost: R
Type: Creature — Goblin Waiter
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: Sacrifice a creature or land: Add 1/2*R to your mana
pool.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Mother of Goons
Cost: 2B
Type: Creature — Human Cleric
Pow/Tgh: 3/2
Rules Text: Whenever a creature an opponent controls is put into
a graveyard from play, sacrifice Mother of Goons unless
you insult that creature.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Mountain
Cost:
Type: Basic Land — Mountain
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: [R]
Set/Rarity: Basic land


Card Name: Mouth to Mouth
Cost: 3U
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You and target opponent have a breath-holding contest.
If you win, you gain control of target creature that
player controls.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Mox Lotus
Cost: 15
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: T: Add [infinite colorless mana] to your mana pool.
100: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
You don't lose life due to mana burn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: My First Tome
Cost: 3
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 1, T: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target
opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that
card. If you do and your opponent guessed wrong, draw
a card.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Name Dropping
Cost: 1G
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says a word that's in
the name of a card in your graveyard, you may say "Gotcha!"
If you do, return that card to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Necro-Impotence
Cost: BBB
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Skip your untap step.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may pay X life.
If you do, untap X permanents.
Pay 1/2 life: Remove the top card of your library from
the game face down. Put that card into your hand at
end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Now I Know My ABC's
Cost: 1UU
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control permanents
with names that include all twenty-six letters of the
English alphabet, you win the game.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Number Crunch
Cost: 2U
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Return target permanent to its owner's hand.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says a number, you may
say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Number Crunch from
your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Old Fogey
Cost: GG
Type: Summon Dinosaur
Pow/Tgh: 7/7
Rules Text: Phasing, cumulative upkeep 1, echo, fading 3, bands
with other Dinosaurs, protection from Homarids, snow-covered
plainswalk, flanking, rampage 2
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Orcish Paratroopers
Cost: 2R
Type: Creature — Orc Paratrooper
Pow/Tgh: 4/4
Rules Text: When Orcish Paratroopers comes into play, flip it from
a height of at least one foot. Sacrifice Orcish Paratroopers
unless it lands face up after turning over completely.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Our Market Research Shows That Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made this Card to Have the Absolute Longest Card Name Ever Elemental
Cost: 1GG
Type: Creature — Elemental
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: Art rampage 2 (Whenever this becomes blocked by a creature,
it gets +2/+2 for each creature in the blocker's art
beyond the first.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Persecute Artist
Cost: 1BB
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Choose an artist other than Rebecca Guay. Target player
reveals his or her hand and discards all nonland cards
by the chosen artist.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Phyrexian Librarian
Cost: 3B
Type: Creature — Horror
Pow/Tgh: 3/3
Rules Text: Flying, trample
At the beginning of your upkeep, remove the top card
of your library from the game face up and balance it
on your body.
When a balanced card falls or touches another balanced
card, sacrifice Phyrexian Librarian.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Plains
Cost:
Type: Basic Land — Plains
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: [W]
Set/Rarity: Basic land


Card Name: Pointy Finger of Doom
Cost: 4
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 3, T: Spin Pointy Finger of Doom in the middle of the
table so that it rotates completely at least once,
then destroy the closest permanent the finger points
to.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Punctuate
Cost: 3R
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Punctuate deals damage to target creature equal to
half the number of punctuation marks in that creature's
text box. (The punctuation marks are ! ? , ; : - —
( ) / " ' & .)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Pygmy Giant
Cost: 1RR
Type: Creature — Giant
Pow/Tgh: 0/2
Rules Text: R, T, Sacrifice a creature: Pygmy Giant deals X damage
to target creature, where X is a number in the sacrificed
creature's text box.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Question Elemental?
Cost: 2UU
Type: Creature — Elemental
Pow/Tgh: 3/4
Rules Text: Flying
Are you aware that when you say something that isn't
a question, the player who first points out this fact
gains control of Question Elemental?
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: R&D's Secret Lair
Cost:
Type: Legendary Land
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Play cards as written. Ignore all errata.
T: Add 1 to your mana pool.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Rare-B-Gone
Cost: 2BR
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Each player sacrifices all rare permanents, then reveals
his or her hand and discards all rare cards.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Red-Hot Hottie
Cost: 2RR
Type: Creature — Elemental
Pow/Tgh: 2/5
Rules Text: Whenever Red-Hot Hottie deals damage to a creature,
put a third-degree-burn counter on that creature. It
has "At the end of each turn, sacrifice this creature
unless you scream 'Aaah!' at the top of your lungs."
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Remodel
Cost: 2G
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: If you control two or more green permanents that share
an artist, you may play Remodel without paying its
mana cost.
Remove target artifact from the game.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Richard Garfield, Ph.D.
Cost: 3UU
Type: Legendary Creature — Human Designer
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: You may play cards as though they were other Magic
cards of your choice with the same mana cost. (Mana
cost includes color.) You can't choose the same card
twice.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Rocket-Powered Turbo Slug
Cost: 3R
Type: Creature — Slug
Pow/Tgh: 3/1
Rules Text: Super haste (This may attack the turn before you play
it. (You may put this card into play from your hand,
tapped and attacking, during your declare attackers
step. If you do, you lose the game at the end of your
next turn unless you pay this card's mana cost during
that turn.))
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Rod of Spanking
Cost: 1
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 2, T: Rod of Spanking deals 1 damage to target player.
Then untap Rod of Spanking unless that player says
"Thank you, sir. May I have another?"
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: S.N.O.T.
Cost: G
Type: Creature — Ooze
Pow/Tgh: *{^2}/*{^2}
Rules Text: As S.N.O.T. comes into play, you may stick it onto
another creature named S.N.O.T. in play. If you do,
all those creatures form a single creature.
S.N.O.T.'s power and toughness are equal to the square
of the number of S.N.O.T.s stuck together. (One is
a 1/1, two are a 4/4, three are a 9/9, and four are
a 16/16.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Sauté
Cost: 1RR
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Sauté deals 31/2 damage to target creature or player.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Save Life
Cost: W
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Choose one — Target player gains 21/2 life; or prevent
the next 21/2 damage that would be dealt to target
creature this turn.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says "Save" or "Life,"
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Save Life from
your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Shoe Tree
Cost: 4G
Type: Creature — Treefolk
Pow/Tgh: 3/3
Rules Text: Shoe Tree comes into play with up to two shoe counters
on it. Use your shoes as counters.
Shoe Tree gets +1/+1 for each shoe counter on it.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Side to Side
Cost: 2G
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: You and target opponent arm-wrestle. If you win, put
a 3/3 green Ape creature token into play.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Six-y Beast
Cost: 3R
Type: Creature — Beast
Pow/Tgh: 0/0
Rules Text: As Six-y Beast comes into play, you secretly put six
or fewer +1/+1 counters on it, then an opponent guesses
the number of counters. If that player guesses right,
sacrifice Six-y Beast.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Smart Ass
Cost: 2U
Type: Creature — Donkey Wizard
Pow/Tgh: 2{1/2}/1
Rules Text: Whenever Smart Ass attacks, name a card. Defending
player may reveal his or her hand and show you that
the named card isn't there. If that player doesn't,
Smart Ass is unblockable this turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Spell Counter
Cost: 2UU
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Counter target spell.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent says "Spell" or "Counter,"
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Spell Counter
from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Standing Army
Cost: 2WW
Type: Creature — Human Soldier
Pow/Tgh: 2/4
Rules Text: As long as you're standing, Standing Army has vigilance.
(Attacking doesn't cause it to tap.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Staying Power
Cost: 2W
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As long as Staying Power is in play, "until end of
turn" and "this turn" effects don't end.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Stone-Cold Basilisk
Cost: 4G
Type: Creature — Basilisk
Pow/Tgh: 2{1/2}/5
Rules Text: Whenever Stone-Cold Basilisk blocks or becomes blocked
by a creature with fewer letters in its name, destroy
that creature at end of combat. (Punctuation and spaces
aren't letters.)
Whenever an opponent reads Stone-Cold Basilisk, that
player is turned to stone until end of turn. Stoned
players can't attack, block, or play spells or abilities.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Stop That
Cost: B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Target player discards a card.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent audibly flicks the cards
in his or her hand, you may say "Gotcha!" If you do,
return Stop That from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Supersize
Cost: 1G
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Target creature gets +31/2/+31/2 until end of turn.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Swamp
Cost:
Type: Basic Land — Swamp
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: [B]
Set/Rarity: Basic land


Card Name: Symbol Status
Cost: 2GG
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Put a 1/1 colorless Expansion-Symbol creature token
into play for each different expansion symbol among
permanents you control.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Tainted Monkey
Cost: 1B
Type: Creature — Ape
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: T: Choose a word. Target player puts the top card of
his or her library into his or her graveyard. If that
card has the chosen word in its text box, that player
loses 3 life.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: The Fallen Apart
Cost: 2BB
Type: Creature — Zombie
Pow/Tgh: 4/4
Rules Text: The Fallen Apart comes into play with two arms and
two legs.
Whenever damage is dealt to The Fallen Apart, remove
an arm or a leg from it.
The Fallen Apart can't attack if it has no legs and
can't block if it has no arms.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Time Machine
Cost: 5
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: T: Remove Time Machine and target nontoken creature
you own from the game. Return both cards to play at
the beginning of your upkeep on your turn X of the
next game you play with the same opponent, where X
is the removed creature's converted mana cost.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Togglodyte
Cost: 3
Type: Artifact Creature — Golem
Pow/Tgh: 4/4
Rules Text: Togglodyte comes into play turned on.
Whenever a player plays a spell, toggle Togglodyte's
ON/OFF switch.
As long as Togglodyte is turned off, it can't attack
or block, and all damage it would deal is prevented.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Topsy Turvy
Cost: 2U
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: The phases of each player's turn are reversed. (The
phases are, in reverse order, end, postcombat main,
combat, precombat main, and beginning.)
If there are more than two players in the game, the
turn order is reversed.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Touch and Go
Cost: 3R
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Destroy target land.
Gotcha — Whenever an opponent touches his or her face,
you may say "Gotcha!" If you do, return Touch and Go
from your graveyard to your hand.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Toy Boat
Cost: 3
Type: Artifact Creature — Ship
Pow/Tgh: 3/3
Rules Text: Cumulative upkeep—Say "Toy Boat" quickly. (At the beginning
of your upkeep, put an age counter on Toy Boat, then
sacrifice it unless you say "Toy Boat" once for each
age counter on it—without pausing between or fumbling
it.)
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Uktabi Kong
Cost: 5GGG
Type: Creature — Ape
Pow/Tgh: 8/8
Rules Text: Trample
When Uktabi Kong comes into play, destroy all artifacts.
Tap two untapped Apes you control: Put a 1/1 green
Ape creature token into play.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Urza's Hot Tub
Cost: 2
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 2, Discard a card: Search your library for a card that
shares a complete word in its name with the discarded
card, reveal it, and put it into your hand. Then shuffle
your library.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Vile Bile
Cost: 1B
Type: Creature — Ooze
Pow/Tgh: 2{1/2}/2{1/2}
Rules Text: Whenever a player's skin or fingernail touches Vile
Bile, that player loses 2 life.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Water Gun Balloon Game
Cost: 2
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: As Water Gun Balloon Game comes into play, each player
puts a pop! counter on a 0.
Whenever a player plays a spell, move that player's
pop! counter up 1.
Whenever a player's pop! counter hits 5, that player
puts a 5/5 pink Giant Teddy Bear creature token into
play and resets all pop! counters to 0.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Wet Willie of the Damned
Cost: 2BB
Type: Sorcery
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Wet Willie of the Damned deals 21/2 damage to target
creature or player and you gain 21/2 life.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: When Fluffy Bunnies Attack
Cost: 3B
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where
X is the number of times the letter of your choice
appears in that creature's name.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Who/What/When/Where/Why
Cost:
Type: Instant
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Who
XW
Instant
Target player gains X life.
-----
What
2R
Instant
Destroy target artifact.
-----
When
2U
Instant
Counter target creature spell.
-----
Where
3B
Instant
Destroy target land.
-----
Why
1G
Instant
Destroy target enchantment.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Wordmail
Cost: W
Type: Enchant Creature
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each word in its
name.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged common


Card Name: Working Stiff
Cost: 1B
Type: Creature — Mummy
Pow/Tgh: 2/2
Rules Text: As Working Stiff comes into play, straighten your arms.
When you bend an elbow, sacrifice Working Stiff.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: World-Bottling Kit
Cost: 5
Type: Artifact
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: 5, Sacrifice World-Bottling Kit: Choose a Magic
set. Remove from the game all permanents with that
set's expansion symbol except for basic lands.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Yet Another Æther Vortex
Cost: 3RR
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: All creatures have haste.
Players play with the top card of their libraries revealed.
Noninstant, nonsorcery cards on top of a library are
in play under their owner's control in addition to
being in that library.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare


Card Name: Zombie Fanboy
Cost: 2B
Type: Creature — Zombie Gamer
Pow/Tgh: 1/1
Rules Text: As Zombie Fanboy comes into play, choose an artist.
Whenever a permanent by the chosen artist is put into
a graveyard, put two +1/+1 counters on Zombie Fanboy.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged uncommon


Card Name: Zzzyxas's Abyss
Cost: 1BB
Type: Enchantment
Pow/Tgh:
Rules Text: At the beginning of your upkeep, destroy all nonland
permanents with the first name alphabetically among
nonland permanents in play.
Set/Rarity: Unhinged rare